Newly Enlightened

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Posts by Newly Enlightened

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  100

  Shiver Me Timbers I Gots a Bible Study Matey!

  by RayPublisher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the new wt 2013 june tells kids that they might get to study with a pirate someday!

  perhaps johnny depp will be resurrected for just that purpose?.

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  Newly Enlightened

  Aaaaaarrrrrrrgggghhhh Matey's can anybody explain the true depths of Davy's Jones locker? Aaaarrrrgg says me, what says you Matey?

  And NOT the Davy Jones of the group MONKEES!

  Y'all are just too funny! Keep it up!
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  100

  Shiver Me Timbers I Gots a Bible Study Matey!

  by RayPublisher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the new wt 2013 june tells kids that they might get to study with a pirate someday!

  perhaps johnny depp will be resurrected for just that purpose?.

  .

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  Newly Enlightened

  A psychologist was quoted in an article in Norway, that JW's are raising the future generation of serial killers; with the graphic, violent images WTBT$ produces in its children literature... [Norway is actually trying to get the kid's literature banned in that country]

  What young kid is going to be thinking of studying with a pirate, even at my age [49], I'm thinking how cool it would be to be on that pirate ship with a cutlass and black powder pistol.

  Hell, I might even dream about that tonight.
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  27

  The koolaid sipping aint far off now....

  by sosoconfused in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so today after the meeting an older pioneer sister was outside as people were talking about the wonderful experience from the yearbook of the family in nigeria or wherever that went to the meeting and the plane destroyed their neighborhood.

  but since they were at the metting they lived..... .

  so she says, "you heard about the ones that died in a bus crash on the way to the convention????

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  Newly Enlightened

  Just Lois: You're right! that is what happened to us. We have a dear friend that we have known since the mid-80's that has always proven himself to be a logical, reasonable, born-in JW and when he told us that he believed that Jesus died upon something resembling a cross, instead of throwing him out and calling him an apostate, we know him well enough to hear him out and he showed us from the Reasoning Book how WTBT$ cherry-picked their sources from the Imperial Bible Dictionary, which is actually pro-cross for the Lord's crucifixion. It was like a light bulb going off in our head and all the puzzle pieces fell into place.

  Which flavor of Kool-aid is the best? The flavor WTBT$ has been serving lately has got to be the 'FRUITY' punch flavor.
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  24

  My life of Debauchery since leaving WTBT$-They were right!!!

  by Gojira_101 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since april 1st will be officially 6 months and i will be considered inactive, i thought this would be a good time for me to review my life since leaving....and i guess wtbt$ is right in that my life would return to a debauched state if i left them...so here is my review and i'm being totally serious here.. .

  sex: yes i have sex with my husband.....i guess we have returned to the world because we take advantage of our marital dues.. related to sex: no longer just missionary.

  drugs: yes i have been taking drugs......my allergies have been so bad the last few days i just couldn't handle it anymore and i gave in to the temptation to take over the counter allergies medicine.. rock and roll: yes......i am no longer listening to the kingdom melodies (i never really did anyways), and have gone to listening to the devils music.

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  Newly Enlightened

  Y'all are just too humorous!

  Don't forget the going and buying Lotto scratchers!

  Gee, she must get her warped sense of humor from her dad. [Brother of the Hawk]
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  2

  a message to you all

  by l p in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  hi all,.

  id just love to say tha i love reading your posts and responses.. there are some really funny people on here with a great sense of humor that show up the funny/ridiculous side of the watchtower and bullshit society's rubbish... .

  lp.

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  Newly Enlightened

  I AGREE! We need more humor. Just in case you haven't seen this one. It's hilarious.

  http://www.jehovahs-witness.net/jw/friends/249475/1/For-those-claiming-to-be-Christ-you-are-not-I-am
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  52

  For those claiming to be Christ: you are not! I am

  by AndDontCallMeShirley in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  for those claiming to be the biblical christ-messiah, you are wrong.

  i am the christ!

  and, i can prove it.. ----.

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  Newly Enlightened

  You are always right Lord. I will not take your name in vain and I am a cheap ass. Since I am in your disfavor and I am selfish. I know you will soon have your Warwick, NY country estate but I have mortgaged my house and built you an entire temple of Girl Scout cookies. I also donated the rest in your HOLY ATM. I will also go prophesy in your name. I hope this all pleases you.

  Lord, one question though. Please do not be angry, but in the latest June WT What were you thinking? Pirates? Is this 'New light"???? I have had a horrible accident by laughing so hard at that article that I fell off my chair, but do not worry it is but just a flesh wound.

  The'Lions don't eat Christians anymore, Rottweilers do' & 'Smitten by a Redneck' was just too funny.
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  5

  A little update....

  by Botzwana in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i will do more as they come....but since the cat is out of the bag i had a visit.... http://monstercafesaltillo.blogspot.mx/2013/03/oh-lookie-lookie.html.

  i will detail all as it gets ramped up..

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  Newly Enlightened

  It always stumps me how they ignore a person [ 6 yrs in our case] but the minute you say or do anything negative or contrary to their beliefs. WHAM! they're crawling out of the wood work.
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  100

  Shiver Me Timbers I Gots a Bible Study Matey!

  by RayPublisher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the new wt 2013 june tells kids that they might get to study with a pirate someday!

  perhaps johnny depp will be resurrected for just that purpose?.

  .

  1. 
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  3. 
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  Newly Enlightened

  Edmond Dantes: Cool name, Count of Monte Christo is a very good movie. But I know that you have been watching the Muppets Treasure Island.

  Wink wink
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  18

  How do you think the Memorial should be celebrated? How are you going to spend it?

  by MsGrowingGirl20 in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  for the first time, i realize that many people have different views about this.. some people believe that all should partake, others don't believe that there should be a memorial.. some are going to the hall, others are having their own celebrations still others are just going to be doing normal activities.. how do you think the memorial should be celebrated?

  how are you going to spend it?.

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  Newly Enlightened

  This will be the first time in my life that I will not be going to KH/phone tie-in to the Memorial. Hubby & I are going to follow the first century Christians example and have a nice quiet dinner at home then partaking in our own little celebration. After reading the gospel of John we personally feel that every disciple of Christ should be partaking.

  But that's just my persoanl thoughts

  Peace be with you
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  100

  Shiver Me Timbers I Gots a Bible Study Matey!

  by RayPublisher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  the new wt 2013 june tells kids that they might get to study with a pirate someday!

  perhaps johnny depp will be resurrected for just that purpose?.

  .

  1. 
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  Newly Enlightened

  So....I wonder how many people are Googling "Jeremiah 'Liver Eating' Johnson right now?

  aaaarrrrrrgggg Why is the rum gone?